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fattyfatty2x4 Posted - 01/03/2006 : 11:29:51 AM
Well.... the new year is here.

I managed to get through the holidays and usually had some kind of holiday fare in my hand or mouth at any given time. My jeans aren't necessarily any tighter, but I am certainly more "jiggly".

Now I find myself LOATHING the thought of food and I am thinking about all kinds of destructive behavior.... just HOW can I get by each day without eating any food? Perhaps if I can starve myself for long enough I can look better and feel better.

Of course this is not gonna happen. If I keep thinking these things I will eventually binge on all the wrong things..... If I TRY any of these things I will most certainly snap and binge on all the wrong things.

It's that desperation creeping up again..... I must find some way to "get real" and actually understand that food is not the enemy.... I must understand that there are really no enemies at all.... except for Paris Hilton and all those other skinny celebrities. If I see another shoulder blade of hipbone that is not my own I will just.... what will I do? eat a donut? walk a brisk mile? (yeah. right.)

this is just so pathetic.


2x4 ~ CW:150+ ~ GW for now: below 140 ~ I think I can! I think I can!
8   L A T E S T    R E P L I E S    (Newest First)
pisces2007 Posted - 05/17/2008 : 8:02:49 PM
Food is definitely our friend. I help people get to the root of why it is they sabotage themselves & why they have issues w/ food & health.
Alex Michael Posted - 04/29/2008 : 8:05:05 PM
quote:
Originally posted by fattyfatty2x4

Well.... the new year is here.

I managed to get through the holidays and usually had some kind of holiday fare in my hand or mouth at any given time. My jeans aren't necessarily any tighter, but I am certainly more "jiggly".

Now I find myself LOATHING the thought of food and I am thinking about all kinds of destructive behavior.... just HOW can I get by each day without eating any food? Perhaps if I can starve myself for long enough I can look better and feel better.

Of course this is not gonna happen. If I keep thinking these things I will eventually binge on all the wrong things..... If I TRY any of these things I will most certainly snap and binge on all the wrong things.

It's that desperation creeping up again..... I must find some way to "get real" and actually understand that food is not the enemy.... I must understand that there are really no enemies at all.... except for Paris Hilton and all those other skinny celebrities. If I see another shoulder blade of hipbone that is not my own I will just.... what will I do? eat a donut? walk a brisk mile? (yeah. right.)

this is just so pathetic.


2x4 ~ CW:150+ ~ GW for now: below 140 ~ I think I can! I think I can!



Yes, remember that! Food is not the enemy, in fact it is most def your friend...embrace what all food can do for you! I posted a recipe up on www.traxee.com it incorporates our favorites, like cream cheese and salt with fresh veggies....I love it...my kids eat it...etc..

Bets Wishes+

ejamesglend Posted - 04/04/2008 : 3:18:50 PM
Thanks jenjen, for all the good advice.

It's hard being a big girl in a skinny girl idolizing world. I've lived it my whole life. There's a difference between being big and being unhealthy. That's the transition that I fear.

It's so hard to be motivated when you don't see results right away. I get to the point of self loathing from time to time. Sometimes when I eat too much I feel horrible, like I should go throw up or fast for weeks. It's an unhealthy way to think, and I try to stay positive. It's hard not to obsess and compare myself to other women.

In the end I try to stay positive and remind myself that I'm fine the way I am, and that it's a good thing to change my life for the better but it's not a good thing to be obsessed over it.

ejamesglend Posted - 04/04/2008 : 3:17:45 PM
Thanks jenjen, for all the good advice.

It's hard being a big girl in a skinny girl idolizing world. I've lived it my whole life. There's a difference between being big and being unhealthy. That's the transition that I fear.

It's so hard to be motivated when you don't see results right away. I get to the point of self loathing from time to time. Sometimes when I eat too much I feel horrible, like I should go throw up or fast for weeks. It's an unhealthy way to think, and I try to stay positive. It's hard not to obsess and compare myself to other women.

In the end I try to stay positive and remind myself that I'm fine the way I am, and that it's a good thing to change my life for the better but it's not a good thing to be obsessed over it.

jenjen01 Posted - 05/03/2007 : 12:00:53 AM
2x4...
Hugs and best wishes. No need to worry about those so-called celebrities and their shoulder bones, they are fake and have no souls. That is what I keep telling myself. The above books posted are an awesome read, I have read them both.

Here are some other tidbits:

"The quality of your health depends upon many pieces that not only include the health of your bodily systems, but also include a healthy diet, exercise, and spirituality.

Diet. Treatment of obesity centers on developing general healthy dietary guidelines, in addition to making some key adjustments in your relationship with food.

Dietary tips for combating obesity:

* Eat more fiber. Fiber gives you a satiated feeling, helping you to curb food cravings. It also keeps your colon healthy, and aids in proper digestion. Research has shown that obesity puts you at higher risk for colorectal cancer, primarily due to a low-fiber, high-calorie, processed food diet. Incorporate ground flax seed in smoothies, soups, and favorite cereals to increase your fiber intake.
* Skip the low-fat food products. Most of the low-fat, processed foods in grocery stores are typically high-carb foods that are loaded with sugar, salt, artificial sweeteners, and synthetic fat substitutes. Many of these ingredients cause weight gain, rather than reduce it. Read more about food ingredients.
* Add virgin coconut oil to your diet. The natural saturated fat in virgin coconut oil can help stabilize blood sugar levels, facilitate proper thyroid function, and aid in weight loss.
* Eat more vegetables and fruits. Not only are they a good source of fiber, but they contain many naturally occurring vitamins, minerals, and amino acids necessary for maintaining optimal health and weight. Watch out for fruit juices, they often contain added sugars that can increase your calorie intake dramatically. Opt for water, or diluted fruit juice (three quarters water and one quarter juice).
* Don’t skip breakfast. Fasting activates the starvation response, slowing your metabolism and increasing the chances that excess fat will be stored to fuel your nutrient-depleted body. Studies now show that women who eat cereal for breakfast maintained their weight better than those who skipped breakfast. The plus of whole grain cereal is that it is a low-calorie, fiber-rich food.3 Obese people tend to lack necessary fiber in their diets.
* Eat frequent meals. Eating five to six small meals throughout the day helps to speed up your metabolism. On the other hand, eating large meals only once or twice a day will actually slow down your metabolism.

Other dietary recommendations:

* Choose high-quality, organic, hormone- and antibiotic-free “grass-fed” meats.
* Increase your omega-3 essential fatty acids by selecting wild-caught salmon, minimal-mercury tuna, and fish oil.
* Choose organic, cage-free eggs.
* Choose unpasteurized, raw dairy items that have live, active cultures (probiotics), such as yogurt and kefir.
* Choose sprouted foods such as sprouted whole-grain bread and sprouted nuts and seeds. Read more about the importance of sprouting nuts.
* Drink plenty of purified water throughout the day. Chronic dehydration can slow down metabolism.

Foods to AVOID when treating obesity:

* All simple or refined carbohydrates (white flour, white rice, white bread, pasta, cookies, cakes, crackers, processed snack foods, etc.). Read more about good carbs and bad carbs.
* All foods containing refined sugar or synthetic sugar-substitutes such as aspartame, Splenda®, etc. These may actually contribute to weight gain, rather than aid in weight loss. Studies now show that artificial sweeteners trick the body into associating sweetness with zero calories. As a result, there’s a tendency to splurge on the “real thing,” because the body loses its ability to associate sweetness with a sense of fullness.4 Choose a natural sweetener like Xylosweet instead.
* Alcoholic beverages in excess since they hinder the functioning of the immune and digestive systems
* Carbonated soft drinks that cause blood pH levels to become acidic
* Bottom crawlers such as oysters, clams, and lobster that may contain toxic levels of mercury.
* Deep-sea fish such as tuna, mackerel, and swordfish that may contain toxic levels of mercury. Choose minimal-mercury tuna instead.
* Farm-raised fish that contain PCBs and not enough omega-3 essential fatty acids, due to their land-based diets. Choose wild-caught salmon instead.
* Sodium nitrite found in processed foods such as hot dogs, lunch meats, and bacon
* Monosodium glutamate (MSG) found in many foods as a flavor enhancer
* Hydrogenated or partially hydrogenated oils (trans fats) found in many processed foods, deep-fried foods, fast foods, and junk food. Read more about trans fats.
* Excessive caffeine intake. While moderate amounts of caffeine may be beneficial in boosting metabolism, excessive caffeine consumption can disrupt the body’s systems, causing insomnia and digestive irregularity (constipation or diarrhea).

Exercise. The basic rule of weight loss is “Calories in. Calories out.” In order to effectively lose weight, you need to burn more calories than you consume. Therefore, exercise—and portion control when eating—are essential components in combating obesity.

If you suffer from obesity, you may have a difficult time keeping up with exercise programs that require flexibility and harsh movements. Fortunately, studies show that long, brisk walks are very effective in losing weight. Once you get to a point where you’re losing weight, you can take on more strenuous or more demanding aerobic exercises. The point is to start exercising, no matter how small your effort may seem in the beginning.5

Also, try to incorporate some strength training into your exercise routine. Building muscle mass will help you to burn more calories throughout the day.

Other Tips for Treating Obesity

* Get proper sleep. Sleep deprivation slows metabolism. If you have trouble falling asleep or staying asleep, try fast-acting melatonin. If sleeping problems are resistant to a quick fix, then see your healthcare professional to rule out any chronic conditions that may be causing insomnia.
* Try light therapy. Circadian Rhythm Disorder can cause hormone imbalances and disrupt your body’s natural hormone production schedule. This may hinder your ability to control your weight effectively."

FROM: http://www.jigsawhealth.com/articles/obesity-dietary.html

Remember, not to quote-steal from a Bill Murray movie, its baby steps. A little something to better yourself every day -- do not worry long term results. Have a goal everyday, achieve it, and then move forward from there.

GOOD LUCK!!!

Mags89 Posted - 04/21/2007 : 11:55:51 PM
A fitness coach I used once gave me a few book suggestions for helping my mind get over some hurdles. "Fight Fat over Forty" (maybe not your age group) is a good one. Also affirming messages to ourselves. I try not to focus on negative thoughts about my body even though there are things I don't like about it of course. "Taming your Gremlin" by Rick Carson is also a must read. Whether you have writer's block, unhealthy eating habits, or can't get into exercise, it's very affirming. The sub-title is "A Surprising Simple Method for Getting out of Your Own Way". Try these ideas and good luck!

maryhitt Posted - 02/23/2007 : 5:25:34 PM
Have any of you every read the book "Body Clutter" by Maria Cilley (a/k/a Flylady) and Leanne Ely? It's near the top of the best seller list on Amazon.com. It's not really so much a diet book as a book that helps us to figure out why we've gotten to where we are. I think it's very helpful.

cometchaser Posted - 01/03/2006 : 12:27:43 PM
2x4!! *hughughughug*

We all understand, we've all been there. some of us return there regularly. (just to check in and make sure our pathology is hanging around) I get jealous of anorexics fairly often. How sick is that?

but in reality it's not sick, it's just feeling defeated. like all other feelings, it's normal if it doesn't take over. aknowledge it, tell yourself this feeling is real and it's okay. THEN forgive yourself, give yourself a little love, and move on. if you can strive towards embracing youself within the process of becoming better - here now, not there then - you will be better at recognising destructuve thoughts when they come in the future. and saying "hello", and letting them go. it's a very freeing feeling.

keep talking, keep checking in here. you can manage this.

light and love,

comet




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